It seems that my glass is half empty

I went to the dentist this morning and they told me that I need two more fillings. Crap. I've been angry about how each one will cost $170. I'm poor and can't afford this crap. I've also been angry about how I need to buy another flight out to DC now, because I have another interview. Prince William County didn't contact me until yesterday, and now they want me to come in on February 24 to interview.

Am I a pessimist? I feel like I'm always calling up Jake to bitch about something. I could try to focus on some of the good stuff though (yeah, I never did do that gratitude journal thing)...hey, I have a better chance of getting a job because I'll have another interview. I have a printer now and don't have to run to school to print off my work. My health is generally really good. I'm not allergic to anything. I'm getting married. I'm going to move to an exciting city where lots of cool stuff happens.

But I'm always saying stuff about how I'm going to miss Wisconsin, how I'm afraid I'm becoming more distant toward my friends, how I don't want to spend the money on another airline ticket, and how I'm pissed off because I bought blue cheese dressing at the grocery store and found out that it tastes disgusting...Jake is probably tired of all my crap.

Is anger different from pessimism? Justin thinks that Jake is an angry person. Are angry people just disillusioned optimists?

States I've been to

This was fun to do. Emily had it on her blog, so I thought I'd give it a whirl as well. I can't remember if I've been in any part of West Virginia, Kansas, or North Dakota. Hmm...I don't think I have. I was only in an airport during a layover in Tennessee. Does that count? This list will help me make sure that I see all 50 states before I die (it's on my 50 things list).

bold the states you've been to, underline the states you've lived in and italicize the state you're in now...

Alabama / Alaska / Arizona / Arkansas / California / Colorado / Connecticut / Delaware / Florida / Georgia / Hawaii / Idaho / Illinois / Indiana / Iowa / Kansas / Kentucky / Louisiana / Maine / Maryland / Massachusetts / Michigan / Minnesota / Mississippi / Missouri / Montana / Nebraska / Nevada / New Hampshire / New Jersey / New Mexico / New York / North Carolina / North Dakota / Ohio / Oklahoma / Oregon / Pennsylvania / Rhode Island / South Carolina / South Dakota / Tennessee / Texas / Utah / Vermont / Virginia / Washington / West Virginia / Wisconsin / Wyoming / Washington D.C. /

Go HERE to have a form generate the HTML for you.

Picking a picture

Well, we took a whole bunch of pictures, but it was a really windy day, so in half the pictures, my hair is blowing in my face. Also, I can't sit still enough to take a decent picture. Jake looks the same in every picture, but I'm all over the place...

Okay, this picture won't get put in the paper, but it's kind of fun because a giant hand is reaching up behind us...haha.

This picture is on the steps of the Jefferson Memorial. I like the background and everything, but my hair is weird and poofy because of the wind. Otherwise, I like it.

I was thinking about using this one as the picture for the newspaper. We're sitting on the stairs in Francis Scott Key park in Georgetown. Does this one look okay?

Getting an Engagement Photo Done

My mom has been asking if Jake and I are gong to get an engagement picture taken. She wants to put something in the Princeton paper. Jake's parents also asked us about putting something in the paper by them. I think that Jake and I are going to have Justin take some pictures of us this weekend. Where should we go to take a good picture? Here's a picture of Jake and me from over break, just for fun...we're in my brother's bedroom.

The Invention of Polka Dots!

Okay, this was bugging me, so I looked it up. Here's an article about the history of polka dots. Apparently someone just named them polka dots to capitalize on the "hot" trend of the polka dance at the same time.

Whew...interviews are done.

Well, I finished my last interview while I'm here this morning. I don't know what to think. I hope that I get something, but I don't feel too sure about it. I'm pretty sure I screwed up the Loudoun County interview pretty bad. I totally BSed a lot of crap, and then afterwards I asked them if they'd give me a card and they totally didn't. I also had to do a writing sample for them, which I don't think I did that good of a job on. Whatever. It sounded like if I got my internship there, it'd be out in the western part of the county, which would end up being a drive forever away. I had to pay about $8 in tolls on the way out to that interview. If I had to pay that everyday, I'd be pretty pissed.
Today I interviewed with Fairfax County. I was pissed at myself because I showed up late. The drive there was supposed to take about 15 minutes, but it wound up taking me 40. The beltway was bumper to bumper and slowed me way down. I thought for sure I'd get there early. When I was on the beltway at the same time yesterday, it was flying along pretty quickly. I gave myself half an hour to make the drive. Anyway, I called the office I was going to to let them know that I was running late. They seemed pretty understanding of my traffic problems, but I am still mad at myself for not anticipating that the beltway could be that packed. The interview itself went okay for the most part, I think...I still think that I'm a stuttering idiot and will probably look way incompetent in comparison to whoever else interviews.
The crappy part about all of this is that I probably will end up flying back out to interview again (unless I can get phone interviews). It sounds like no one is going to let me know either way if I have something until mid to late February. Other places are doing their interviews at the end of February...so, I might not hear about anything until after I buy plane tickets to come back out here.
I'm just glad to be done for now. Now I can relax a bit for the next few days that I'm here...

My First Interview

Well, my interview at Prince George's County went differently than I had expected. I don't know how I feel about it. I didn't completely bomb it or bust out crying or anything weird, but still...I'm worried about getting an internship. I was kind of expecting my interview to be with maybe one or two people, but there was a panel of about 10 people in the room. Wow, not what I expected at all. The nice thing about it was that they gave me a sheet of paper with all of their interview questions on it, so I could look them over as we were talking. Luckily, a lot of their questions were things that I actually had prepared. I know that I really kind of rambled and sputtered a lot, though. God, I hate being so nervous. They seemed pretty impressed with my resume, so at least that was a plus.
The director of Psychological Services went to school in Wisconsin, too. Hopefully, that kind of gives me an "in". I don't know, though... It was kind of weird. When I came into the room and I got introduced to her, she was like, "It's my fellow Badger!" and she came up and gave me a hug. It was kind of awkward. I feel like I probably pulled away a bit and made the whole thing awkward.
They also had me complete a writing sample, which was interesting...yup, didn't know that they were going to have me do that...
The whole thing was set up like an "interview day". Other people were there interviewing while I was completing my writing sample and talking to the current interns there. I saw three other people that were interviewing while I was there. A couple of them were pretty intimidating. They seemed really smart and well put together. The interns that were there were really smart, too. One of them talked about how she had her Master's in clinical psych and she did work for two years with a neuropsychologist at John's Hopkins and she's finishing her doctorate. I know at least one guy that was applying said he is going on to get his doctorate, too. I don't want to get a doctorate...I just want to work in the schools. Yeah, um... those people were way intimidating. I feel like I don't have enough aspirations and am a lazy person.
They have four openings and I saw four people there (counting me) interviewing today. The director told me that they'll probably have two more interview days before they make decisions. She said they'll let me know in 4 to 6 weeks if I have a position. I just hope I get something. Well, I guess I'll see how the other interviews I have go...